


polar opposites

by third



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Canon Universe, First Time, Happy Ending, Jeonghan is insecure, M/M, Mingyu just wants to be loved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-30
Updated: 2017-10-30
Packaged: 2019-01-26 18:19:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12563368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/third/pseuds/third
Summary: There were a lot of things that Jeonghan and Mingyu didn’t match on. Mingyu should’ve realised that relationships were one of them.Or: Mingyu has always been able to see through Jeonghan. Just not for this.





	polar opposites

Jeonghan kisses Mingyu at the most inopportune times. 

That’s what Mingyu thinks, anyway, when the silence in the room becomes unbearable and Jeonghan leans down to press a kiss against his lips.

“Hyung,” Mingyu says, turning away. Jeonghan’s face is so close, and Mingyu fights the urge to lean into the familiar warmth. “Don’t.” It feels like there’s something lodged in his throat, making it hard for him to breathe. Hard for him to speak. 

“I’m sorry,” Jeonghan says, voice sounding choked. There’s a pain in his eyes, but Mingyu doesn’t know—isn’t sure—if it’s because Jeonghan’s actually sad or if it’s because he’s sad that Mingyu’s sad. “I’m sorry it didn’t work out.”

 _But it was_ , Mingyu wants to say, but doesn’t. Instead, he watches as Jeonghan leaves the room, trying not to think about how that may be the last kiss they’ll ever share. 

 

 

“Is something going on between you and Jeonghan-hyung?” Jihoon asks, in a break between recordings. 

Mingyu stares at the piece of paper in front of him, at the markings and corrections he made, at the places where his tone isn’t right or where he fumbles with the words. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Jihoon sighs. “What I mean is, the two of you haven’t willingly been in the same room for about a month now.” When Mingyu doesn’t reply, Jihoon sighs again. “Whatever,” he says, “just make sure it doesn’t affect the rest of us. Break’s over. Can you go over the second verse again?”

 

 

The first time that Mingyu realised that he liked Jeonghan came in a mist of empty bottles and soft smiles.

It was a fraction of a second, and in that small frame of time, somehow something in Mingyu’s brain switched, and seeing Jeonghan’s face so close to his, in the couch of their dorm as the other members slept away, made him want to lean in and close the distance.

Maybe it was his alcohol filled brain, the way Jeonghan didn’t seem to react when Mingyu moved closer (instead, only staring at Mingyu’s eyes, then his nose, then his lips), or maybe it was just Mingyu’s complete lack of self-control, that had Mingyu leaning in closer and pressing his lips so softly against Jeonghan’s.

Mingyu had pulled back afterwards as if he’d been burned, the feeling of Jeonghan’s lips still against his own. But then there’d been a hand against the back of his head, pressing him in closer until their mouths touched again. This time Jeonghan kissed back, forceful and impatient. The sensation of Jeonghan’s tongue running against Mingyu’s lips had him moaning, opening up until Mingyu didn’t want the moment to stop, wanting Jeonghan to be closer, wanting every part of him.

Then, a door slammed against a frame, and the two of them split apart, panting heavily.

“Well, that happened,” Jeonghan had said, before patting Mingyu on the thigh, dangerously close to where he was throbbing, and then getting up and going to his room.

Mingyu had cleaned up after them and then went to bed, not knowing what to think.

 

 

“The two of you should talk to each other,” Jisoo says, when it’s just the two of them in the car, the rest of the members slowly making their way out of the studio. 

Mingyu had worked past Seungcheol bringing it up by acting clueless, so he tries to use the same tactic. “Who should?” Mingyu asks.

Jisoo powers through like Mingyu didn’t even say anything. “It’s been a while now,” Jisoo says. “None of us are happy at looking at the two of you be so miserable.”

 _Priceless_ , Mingyu thinks. Jeonghan being miserable when he’s the reason they’re like this.

“I’ll think about it,” Mingyu says, and ignores it when Jisoo stares at him like he doesn’t believe him. 

 

 

The first time that they slept together, Mingyu was a bumbling mess of nerves.

It took a while for them to find a time when all of their members were out of the dorm, and when they weren’t at risk of being interrupted while they were in the midst of things.

“If you’re too nervous,” Jeonghan had said, staring at Mingyu as he fumbled with the lube, “we don’t have to do this right now.” His shirt was unbuttoned, hair messy across his face, and looking all too much for Mingyu to handle. 

“No,” Mingyu said, “I want to do this.” And it was true—there was nothing more that Mingyu wanted.

It was a surreal experience, to watch as the two of them slowly became connected, to watch as Jeonghan’s face changed, slowly losing composure. The pleasure was too much, too good, but beyond that, the giddiness that Jeonghan had let him have this, overwhelmed Mingyu.

 

 

The two of them do end up talking to each other, after a wayward plan from Chan and Minghao that Mingyu should’ve seen through. 

He ends up in Jihoon’s studio, watching as Jeonghan is shoved into the room by Hansol and Seungkwan.

“What are you guys doing?” Jeonghan asks, but then stops when he sees Mingyu sitting there in Jihoon’s chair. “Oh,” he says. His face turns impassive, and it feels weird for Mingyu to not know what he’s thinking.

“How long have you been here?” Jeonghan asks, and Mingyu ignores the race in his chest, the traitorous speeding up of his heartbeat. _He broke up with you_ , Mingyu thinks, _stop caring so much about him._

Mingyu glances at the clock on the wall, so he doesn’t have to look at Jeonghan’s face. “Twenty minutes now?” Mingyu says.

“Ah,” Jeonghan says, “sorry for making you wait.”

 

 

The first time that Mingyu told Jeonghan he loved him was surrounded by bright morning light, a victory behind their backs, and a future together so clear.

There was something in the air, waking up in their shared hotel room to Jeonghan’s face staring right at Mingyu’s own that had him saying, so softy, “I love you.”

Mingyu had expected a smile, an encouragement, or maybe, in an ideal world an _I love you_ back, but Mingyu had always been a dreamer, expecting too much. Instead, he got a shocked look on Jeonghan’s face, before he forced a smile and pulled away.

“I’m going to get ready,” Jeonghan had said, rolling out of bed.

Staring at the empty spot beside him, Mingyu couldn’t help but think he messed up.

 

 

“Will you ever tell me why?” Mingyu says, after forty minutes of silence.

Every so often, one of them will walk to the door and try to get someone to open it, but it seems like the members have all abandoned them. Mingyu had tried calling Wonwoo or Junhui to get him out, but none of them were answering their phones. He assumed it was the same for everyone else.

“I think I’ve explained enough,” Jeonghan replies.

“No,” Mingyu says, “you said you wanted to break up and that was it.”

“There’s nothing more to say,” Jeonghan says.

When Mingyu just stares at him, Jeonghan doesn’t say anything. It’s when Mingyu looks away, deciding to himself that he won’t care anymore, that’s when Jeonghan speaks.

“I’ve never been in a relationship where I’m not the one who cares the most,” Jeonghan says, not looking at Mingyu. “It’s been too hard, watching as they leave. I’d rather do it first.”

“Hyung,” Mingyu says, a little bit heartbroken. “I wouldn’t have left you.”

Jeonghan smiles. “You never know.”

“No,” Mingyu says, “I don’t think you understand.” There were a lot of things that Jeonghan and Mingyu didn’t match on—Mingyu should’ve realised that relationships were one of them. Where Mingyu wanted to give his heart and soul, Jeonghan was more jaded and careful, giving only the pieces of himself he was willing to give. Mingyu should’ve seen through it, but he was too blind in his happiness. Too content to care. “I loved you, hyung,” Mingyu says. “I love you now even though I don’t want to anymore. I wouldn’t have left you.”

Jeonghan takes a breath in. “I don’t know what to do with that love,” he says, finally.

“You accept it,” Mingyu says. “And love me back.”

 

 

Outside, as soon as they walk down the hall, they’re met with eleven faces waiting for them.

“Did you guys make up yet?” Soonyoung asks, glancing up from his phone.

Jeonghan grabs Mingyu’s hand and holds it up like a trophy, like he’s won. “Yes,” Jeonghan says. “But don’t think that means I’m forgetting you guys did this to me any time soon.”

Mingyu laughs as he sees at least two of them visibly shudder. 

“We did it for you,” Seokmin says, but then quietens under Jeonghan’s glare. 

Mingyu watches as they argue with each other, not even minding, instead feeling the warmth of Jeonghan’s hand in his and finally feeling content for the first time in a long time.

**Author's Note:**

> so recently i’ve been in a downward spiral of seventeen fandom things, and a few days ago, i spent the few hours i had before work binge-watching seventeen videos. then i went to work, thought of this, and it was the _only_ thing i could think about for hours… so here it is: a super self-indulgent thing that i really wanted to write. 
> 
> anyway, thank you so much for reading! comments and kudos are love, as always ♡


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